Funny, he seems to have read the letter and enjoyed the story of my exploits as a Nazi hunter. Be warned, however. The all caps style kind of hurts your eyes.
*****
HEY GREAT HEARING FROM YOU-- SURE SOUNDS LIKE YOU HAVE SOME
REAL TALENTS. MUST HAVE GIVEN YOU SOME EXCITEMENT AND A REAL
PURPOSE. NATE, I CAN RELATE TO YOUR FINANCIAL NEEDS AT THIS TIME
IN YOUR LIFE-- I NEEDED SOME CHANGES ALSO. AT THIS TIME I AM
PROMOTING TWO BUSINESES FROM HOME--- WHY TWO? THE MONEY
AND THE ONE YOU RESPONDED TO WILL GROW INTO A GREAT MONTHLY
INCOME IN A SHORT TIME-- ON ONLY $10/ mo YES ITS LEGAL-- YOU
WILL WANT TO LOOK IT OVER, AND UNDERSTAND IT MAY NOT LOOK
LIKE MUCH AT FIRST BUT IT HAS ALOT TO OFFER. MY OTHER BUSINESS
IS ALSO GREAT-- YOU CAN CHECK OUT BOTH-- SIGN UP FOR FREE ON
EITHER PROGRAM FOR A FREE TEST DRIVE. THANKS FOR YOUR REPLY.
FOR THE $10/ mo PLAN---http://my.ws/davethulin
FOR OTHER PLAN__ http://Cruise4Life.ws
BEST REGARDS
DAVID THULIN
Friday, February 27, 2009
Thursday, February 26, 2009
Home Biz-Cash Cow
Your very own cash cow without committing more than $10 a month. In business for yourself with truely UNLIMITED residual earnings. Too good to be true? Not at all. We'll prove it and you can test drive this program for free-so you can potentially earn profits berfore you pay a dime. 7 min. video. For contact information email me at trex99k@yahoo.com
*****
I'm old, boy. Too old for a job, but times are tough, and this bird isn't going to take a beating from the economy sitting down. Not after what I've seen, what I've lived through and what I've done. Hell no, this old bastard's going out swinging, just how I came in.
Here's what you should know about me: In another time I was a Nazi hunter. I've flown around the world, seeking the cowards out and sending them to jail or hell, whichever they make me do first. You ever smelled the stink of a man hiding in the jungle living in his own shit for ten years? It's not a pretty smell. But you feel good when you can smell it on your private plane, flying back to Germany to put the devil behind bars. Anyway, like I said, that's what I used to do. Retired about fifteen years ago - not too many of the buzzards left breathing right around then, certainly not now that I need to make some extra money on the side. So what I need is a job. A job an old man can do, preferably from home.
So what's this racket you've got going here? I assume it's mostly on the up and up - I won't commit any cons, but I will skirt the law. Done it enough times in my line of work. Christ, my line of work. My former line of work, is what I mean to say. God, those times will never come back. Things were better then, easier. Find a Nazi, try to keep yourself from killing a Nazi, sometimes succeed, sometimes put your thumbs where his throat keeps his breathers and push until they stop working. Yeah, it was a good life.
But it's over now. So let's get this home biz thing underway, huh? It's gotta bring in a decent amount, but not so much. I've simple enough needs.
And if you need someone to find you a Nazi, well, hell, I'll do that too.
Nate Balding
*****
I'm old, boy. Too old for a job, but times are tough, and this bird isn't going to take a beating from the economy sitting down. Not after what I've seen, what I've lived through and what I've done. Hell no, this old bastard's going out swinging, just how I came in.
Here's what you should know about me: In another time I was a Nazi hunter. I've flown around the world, seeking the cowards out and sending them to jail or hell, whichever they make me do first. You ever smelled the stink of a man hiding in the jungle living in his own shit for ten years? It's not a pretty smell. But you feel good when you can smell it on your private plane, flying back to Germany to put the devil behind bars. Anyway, like I said, that's what I used to do. Retired about fifteen years ago - not too many of the buzzards left breathing right around then, certainly not now that I need to make some extra money on the side. So what I need is a job. A job an old man can do, preferably from home.
So what's this racket you've got going here? I assume it's mostly on the up and up - I won't commit any cons, but I will skirt the law. Done it enough times in my line of work. Christ, my line of work. My former line of work, is what I mean to say. God, those times will never come back. Things were better then, easier. Find a Nazi, try to keep yourself from killing a Nazi, sometimes succeed, sometimes put your thumbs where his throat keeps his breathers and push until they stop working. Yeah, it was a good life.
But it's over now. So let's get this home biz thing underway, huh? It's gotta bring in a decent amount, but not so much. I've simple enough needs.
And if you need someone to find you a Nazi, well, hell, I'll do that too.
Nate Balding
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Indoor Cycling Instructor
The Willamette Athletic Club is looking for certified, energetic cycling instructors to teach our Saturday morning spin and lift class. Please forward a cover letter and resume to Kristi at kristi.wac@gmail.com for consideration.
*****
Yeah, I COULD teach your class, but the question is, can YOUR CLASS teach anything to ME?
I build fixies. That's right, I turn crappy ten speed bicycles into lean, mean car thwarting machines that only stop if you're cool enough to stop them. I also have a record collection. But why do these things matter to you? They should matter, because what they say about me is that I'm someone with the athletic skill to power through a hundred spinning classes but would prefer to just ride to Stumptown and back. But since I haven't had a job for three years (college - sucked) and my money's running out I guess I could deign to cycle for your gym. I'm really good at it (obvs!) and you'll be amazed by my indoor cycling ability. I can read Noam Chomsky and bike at the same time, so I can pretty easily turn your spin and lift class into a seminar on the politics of oppression while I turn your students into skinny white waifs.
Get back to me.
-Flash (that's not my birth name, but it's the name I've adopted, so use it fascist!)
PS: If your club has a lot of naked old men taking showers after work, I can't work there. I fucking hate old balls.
*****
Yeah, I COULD teach your class, but the question is, can YOUR CLASS teach anything to ME?
I build fixies. That's right, I turn crappy ten speed bicycles into lean, mean car thwarting machines that only stop if you're cool enough to stop them. I also have a record collection. But why do these things matter to you? They should matter, because what they say about me is that I'm someone with the athletic skill to power through a hundred spinning classes but would prefer to just ride to Stumptown and back. But since I haven't had a job for three years (college - sucked) and my money's running out I guess I could deign to cycle for your gym. I'm really good at it (obvs!) and you'll be amazed by my indoor cycling ability. I can read Noam Chomsky and bike at the same time, so I can pretty easily turn your spin and lift class into a seminar on the politics of oppression while I turn your students into skinny white waifs.
Get back to me.
-Flash (that's not my birth name, but it's the name I've adopted, so use it fascist!)
PS: If your club has a lot of naked old men taking showers after work, I can't work there. I fucking hate old balls.
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Phone Sales Not appointment setting!!!
Phone Sales Not appointment setting!!!
Recession Proof!
Golf related advertising
11.50 per hour Guaranteed, Quick advancement, Bonuses
Medical, Dental, Vision, 401K Provided
On Bus Line, This is not a boiler room this is a full time position with a 26-yr. Old co. that does well in bad times.
Call 503-221-0022 Ask for Seth
*****
Oh, what dismal days doth descend that mine arms cans't grip luxury with impugne. Lest another drear penniless night befall I am urged by Necess'ty onward into life's grand languor to dwell betwixt subjugation and suicide nearby telephones. Take my life, take my place! Grand inquisitors doth comprehend my back taxes, I beseech thee for a scheme of escape at the behest of your golden dialling fingers! Appointments I shall set, meet, delay, whatevs! 'Sale by phone' underwritt'n my nametag, Master of persuasive purchases hastily, verily! upon utterance 'hired.' Mine customers shall beget mine customers future, a line unto the engorged star floating in our ebullient sky! Take this wretch and tear back the veil of futility to shine with your black vision upon my great gift: Results!
Tis' thine own decision, I grant. Tho' loosing me among your hounds and your chickens shall reap reward unlike you've encountered prior! The wolf prowls silent and sweet.
Nate
Recession Proof!
Golf related advertising
11.50 per hour Guaranteed, Quick advancement, Bonuses
Medical, Dental, Vision, 401K Provided
On Bus Line, This is not a boiler room this is a full time position with a 26-yr. Old co. that does well in bad times.
Call 503-221-0022 Ask for Seth
*****
Oh, what dismal days doth descend that mine arms cans't grip luxury with impugne. Lest another drear penniless night befall I am urged by Necess'ty onward into life's grand languor to dwell betwixt subjugation and suicide nearby telephones. Take my life, take my place! Grand inquisitors doth comprehend my back taxes, I beseech thee for a scheme of escape at the behest of your golden dialling fingers! Appointments I shall set, meet, delay, whatevs! 'Sale by phone' underwritt'n my nametag, Master of persuasive purchases hastily, verily! upon utterance 'hired.' Mine customers shall beget mine customers future, a line unto the engorged star floating in our ebullient sky! Take this wretch and tear back the veil of futility to shine with your black vision upon my great gift: Results!
Tis' thine own decision, I grant. Tho' loosing me among your hounds and your chickens shall reap reward unlike you've encountered prior! The wolf prowls silent and sweet.
Nate
Friday, February 13, 2009
If You Like To Sell, You'll LOVE This
This posting is for anyone who likes to sell. My company has an outstanding product of which every small business has a need. This opportunity is a perfect fit from stay at home moms to seasoned professionals. This job opportunity is a commission based job which pays out every 2 weeks. Your motivation is the key to your income.
We are a national Internet Advertising company looking for outstanding sales people who can thrive in a commission environment providing a low cost, highly beneficial online advertising solution to small business owners.
Applicants must be highly motivated, ambitious people who are not afraid to talk to small business owners. Our reps have the potential of $60K - $90K+ with a 6 figure potential for our top performing leaders! We pride ourselves on our training resources and the ability to give our sales team the skills and tools they need to succeed in the competitive advertising industry. The ideal candidate will have a background in inside or outside sales with excellent communication skills. Even though experience is a plus, it is not necessary.
Professional Benefits Include:
• Generous Commission Structure
• Strategic Sales Training and Ongoing Mentoring
• A Company Culture with Strong Values and Commitment
Please email resume or letter of intent to: goforit@q.com.
* APPLY ONLY if you are committed to success
*****
Committed to Success! That's not just my middle name, it's my entire name!
Listen, you've found your perfect salesman, and how. Let me iterate a few of my finer points in a fashion I'm sure you're accustomed to - that is to say, sitting bar side at a strip club waving dollars at asses over a couple of scotch and sodas. Oh, for now just pretend there's a sweet Asian buttocks swaying like a sweet Louisiana Lullaby just inches from your face and I'll sell like I've never sold before:
*Great smile, great hair, great handshake - the keystone to any great sale
*Commitment to success (I mentioned that earlier; it legally is my name)
*A deep abiding love of mystery products - you don't tell, I won't ask, even if it's Thai children
*Willing to go the long haul, no matter what. If I have to shove a condom of big H up my ass for this organization consider it done pal!
*Love to sell. I could sell all day long and never get tired of selling, over and over, like a great pink cloud raining down in thick spurts of sales and covering the face of the Earth - Oh I LOVE SALES!
*I'm a quick learner
*Fast with my hands
*Will steal your wallet and your car to prove it
*Already inside the organization - I'm just so good that nobody knows it yet
So, there you have it. Me, in all my grandeur, laid out like one of your close cronies. What do you say? Let's make some people buy some shit they don't want. By the time I'm done with a mark they don't know up from down. I'll put product out there like I'm Johnny fucking Appleseed. I find the fertile soil and I till it until it relents, at which point I plant my seed (your product, you old salt!) and peace out before it has time to gestate and grow.
We'll be beautiful, buddy!
Cheers,
Nate Balding
We are a national Internet Advertising company looking for outstanding sales people who can thrive in a commission environment providing a low cost, highly beneficial online advertising solution to small business owners.
Applicants must be highly motivated, ambitious people who are not afraid to talk to small business owners. Our reps have the potential of $60K - $90K+ with a 6 figure potential for our top performing leaders! We pride ourselves on our training resources and the ability to give our sales team the skills and tools they need to succeed in the competitive advertising industry. The ideal candidate will have a background in inside or outside sales with excellent communication skills. Even though experience is a plus, it is not necessary.
Professional Benefits Include:
• Generous Commission Structure
• Strategic Sales Training and Ongoing Mentoring
• A Company Culture with Strong Values and Commitment
Please email resume or letter of intent to: goforit@q.com.
* APPLY ONLY if you are committed to success
*****
Committed to Success! That's not just my middle name, it's my entire name!
Listen, you've found your perfect salesman, and how. Let me iterate a few of my finer points in a fashion I'm sure you're accustomed to - that is to say, sitting bar side at a strip club waving dollars at asses over a couple of scotch and sodas. Oh, for now just pretend there's a sweet Asian buttocks swaying like a sweet Louisiana Lullaby just inches from your face and I'll sell like I've never sold before:
*Great smile, great hair, great handshake - the keystone to any great sale
*Commitment to success (I mentioned that earlier; it legally is my name)
*A deep abiding love of mystery products - you don't tell, I won't ask, even if it's Thai children
*Willing to go the long haul, no matter what. If I have to shove a condom of big H up my ass for this organization consider it done pal!
*Love to sell. I could sell all day long and never get tired of selling, over and over, like a great pink cloud raining down in thick spurts of sales and covering the face of the Earth - Oh I LOVE SALES!
*I'm a quick learner
*Fast with my hands
*Will steal your wallet and your car to prove it
*Already inside the organization - I'm just so good that nobody knows it yet
So, there you have it. Me, in all my grandeur, laid out like one of your close cronies. What do you say? Let's make some people buy some shit they don't want. By the time I'm done with a mark they don't know up from down. I'll put product out there like I'm Johnny fucking Appleseed. I find the fertile soil and I till it until it relents, at which point I plant my seed (your product, you old salt!) and peace out before it has time to gestate and grow.
We'll be beautiful, buddy!
Cheers,
Nate Balding
Job Title: Bouncer / Security Guard
Job Location: Portland / Gresham / Boring
Computer Skills: N/A
Hours per week: 20
Occupational Skills:Required
Shifts Available: 3rd (Night)
How to apply for this position:
Position is: Part Time
E-mail or fax your resume to: DB_SSINC@VERIZON.NET / 503-512-7677
Job Summary: REQUIREMENTS:
* High school diploma or GED.
* Minimum 21 years of age.
* Minimum six months security experience.
PREFERRED:
* DPSST certification.
* Employer will help attain DPSST.
JOB DUTIES:
* Work for security services company
EMPLOYER COMMENTS:
"We have very strict personal grooming and dress code
standards for working with the public; No visible piercings or tattoos.
Clothing must be clean and well fitted. Anyone appearing for an interview with less than these qualifications will not be considered.
Security is a very visual job and requires applicants to be extremely professional.
As a company we take extreme pride in our employees and expect them to hold the same standards for themselves.
These minimum standards are non-negotiable so please read them
carefully. Thank You."
HOURS:
Exact days and times to be arranged.
LOCATION:
Gresham, OR 97080
Job Classification: Security Guards
Experience Required: At least 6 months
Compensation
Salary: $9.00 to $11.00 per Hour, DOE, + tips
Job Requirements
Education Required: High School Diploma/GED Minimum Age: 21
Gender: N/A
Employer will perform: Background Check, Drug Test
*****
Yah so I just got out tha' joint doin' a whole year, so that's security experience like you wouldn't fuckn' believe huh? Anywayz, I got the experience and you got the job opening. No tattoos or piercings you can see (just the one that sez T R A I N W R E C K on the side of my dick, hah!) cuz i didn't get fucked in the can like some bitches, you know? I jus' did the time, two days. Day you go in, day you come out, just like the old G's used ta say before they got irrelevant, you know?
Yah so this is a night shift, right? Cause I got enrolled back in school for the days, doin' that Everest College thing or whatever makin' a clean break wit h my old life and whatnot. Don't need no mother fuckers comin by the house at three am scratchin they necks and shit like a bunch of fuckin needy little punk bitches. I hate those dick suckers, man, I jus wanna beat some of em into little fuckin pieces, but instead I'll beat mother fuckers you don't want in yo club or whatever when they get out a hand.
So what's the deal? Gimme a job man. I need this shit, I don't wanna go back to prison.
Computer Skills: N/A
Hours per week: 20
Occupational Skills:Required
Shifts Available: 3rd (Night)
How to apply for this position:
Position is: Part Time
E-mail or fax your resume to: DB_SSINC@VERIZON.NET / 503-512-7677
Job Summary: REQUIREMENTS:
* High school diploma or GED.
* Minimum 21 years of age.
* Minimum six months security experience.
PREFERRED:
* DPSST certification.
* Employer will help attain DPSST.
JOB DUTIES:
* Work for security services company
EMPLOYER COMMENTS:
"We have very strict personal grooming and dress code
standards for working with the public; No visible piercings or tattoos.
Clothing must be clean and well fitted. Anyone appearing for an interview with less than these qualifications will not be considered.
Security is a very visual job and requires applicants to be extremely professional.
As a company we take extreme pride in our employees and expect them to hold the same standards for themselves.
These minimum standards are non-negotiable so please read them
carefully. Thank You."
HOURS:
Exact days and times to be arranged.
LOCATION:
Gresham, OR 97080
Job Classification: Security Guards
Experience Required: At least 6 months
Compensation
Salary: $9.00 to $11.00 per Hour, DOE, + tips
Job Requirements
Education Required: High School Diploma/GED Minimum Age: 21
Gender: N/A
Employer will perform: Background Check, Drug Test
*****
Yah so I just got out tha' joint doin' a whole year, so that's security experience like you wouldn't fuckn' believe huh? Anywayz, I got the experience and you got the job opening. No tattoos or piercings you can see (just the one that sez T R A I N W R E C K on the side of my dick, hah!) cuz i didn't get fucked in the can like some bitches, you know? I jus' did the time, two days. Day you go in, day you come out, just like the old G's used ta say before they got irrelevant, you know?
Yah so this is a night shift, right? Cause I got enrolled back in school for the days, doin' that Everest College thing or whatever makin' a clean break wit h my old life and whatnot. Don't need no mother fuckers comin by the house at three am scratchin they necks and shit like a bunch of fuckin needy little punk bitches. I hate those dick suckers, man, I jus wanna beat some of em into little fuckin pieces, but instead I'll beat mother fuckers you don't want in yo club or whatever when they get out a hand.
So what's the deal? Gimme a job man. I need this shit, I don't wanna go back to prison.
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