Friday, February 13, 2009

If You Like To Sell, You'll LOVE This

This posting is for anyone who likes to sell. My company has an outstanding product of which every small business has a need. This opportunity is a perfect fit from stay at home moms to seasoned professionals. This job opportunity is a commission based job which pays out every 2 weeks. Your motivation is the key to your income.
We are a national Internet Advertising company looking for outstanding sales people who can thrive in a commission environment providing a low cost, highly beneficial online advertising solution to small business owners.
Applicants must be highly motivated, ambitious people who are not afraid to talk to small business owners. Our reps have the potential of $60K - $90K+ with a 6 figure potential for our top performing leaders! We pride ourselves on our training resources and the ability to give our sales team the skills and tools they need to succeed in the competitive advertising industry. The ideal candidate will have a background in inside or outside sales with excellent communication skills. Even though experience is a plus, it is not necessary.

Professional Benefits Include:
• Generous Commission Structure
• Strategic Sales Training and Ongoing Mentoring
• A Company Culture with Strong Values and Commitment

Please email resume or letter of intent to:

* APPLY ONLY if you are committed to success


Committed to Success! That's not just my middle name, it's my entire name!

Listen, you've found your perfect salesman, and how. Let me iterate a few of my finer points in a fashion I'm sure you're accustomed to - that is to say, sitting bar side at a strip club waving dollars at asses over a couple of scotch and sodas. Oh, for now just pretend there's a sweet Asian buttocks swaying like a sweet Louisiana Lullaby just inches from your face and I'll sell like I've never sold before:

*Great smile, great hair, great handshake - the keystone to any great sale
*Commitment to success (I mentioned that earlier; it legally is my name)
*A deep abiding love of mystery products - you don't tell, I won't ask, even if it's Thai children
*Willing to go the long haul, no matter what. If I have to shove a condom of big H up my ass for this organization consider it done pal!
*Love to sell. I could sell all day long and never get tired of selling, over and over, like a great pink cloud raining down in thick spurts of sales and covering the face of the Earth - Oh I LOVE SALES!
*I'm a quick learner
*Fast with my hands
*Will steal your wallet and your car to prove it
*Already inside the organization - I'm just so good that nobody knows it yet

So, there you have it. Me, in all my grandeur, laid out like one of your close cronies. What do you say? Let's make some people buy some shit they don't want. By the time I'm done with a mark they don't know up from down. I'll put product out there like I'm Johnny fucking Appleseed. I find the fertile soil and I till it until it relents, at which point I plant my seed (your product, you old salt!) and peace out before it has time to gestate and grow.

We'll be beautiful, buddy!


Nate Balding

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