Friday, December 5, 2008

Moonstruck Chocolate Sales Associate and Shift Lead

Moonstruck Chocolate Cafe in Beaverton is looking for enthusiastic chocolate lovers to join the team!
We are looking for Full-Time and Part-Time Sales Associates for permanent positions. And a Part-Time Shift Lead.
You must be able to start immediately and have open availability to work through December.
Some of the criteria for these positions are a great attitude, team player, excellent customer service, leadership skills and integrity. Coffee knowledge and chocolate knowledge are a plus.
So if you love delighting customers and would like to work in a delicious environment please submit your resume.


Hello chocoriffic chocophiles!

Before I do anything else, I'd like to share with you this excellent selection of quotes from the film Moonstruck, which will prove my excellent candidacy for this position:

Mona: You have such a head for knowing!

Cosmo Castorini: Birds fly to the stars - I guess...

Cosmo Castorini: There are three kinds of pipe. There's aluminum, which is garbage. There's bronze, which is pretty good, unless something goes wrong. And something always goes wrong. Then, there's copper, which is the only pipe I use. It costs money. It costs money because it saves money.

Ronny Cammareri: I love you.
Loretta Castorini: [slaps him twice] Snap out of it!

Ronny Cammareri: Loretta, I love you. Not like they told you love is, and I didn't know this either, but love don't make things nice - it ruins everything. It breaks your heart. It makes things a mess. We aren't here to make things perfect. The snowflakes are perfect. The stars are perfect. Not us. Not us! We are here to ruin ourselves and to break our hearts and love the wrong people and *die*. The storybooks are *bullshit*. Now I want you to come upstairs with me and *get* in my bed!

Ronny Cammareri: Everything seems like nothing to me now, 'cause I want you in my bed. I don't care if I burn in hell. I don't care if you burn in hell. The past and the future is a joke to me now. I see that they're nothing. I see they ain't here. The only thing that's here is you - and me.

Rose Castorini: You... you got a love bite on your neck. He's coming back this morning, what's the matter with you? You're life's going down the toilet! Cover up that damn thing! Come on, put some make-up on it!

Ronny Cammareri: A bride without a head!
Loretta Castorini: A wolf without a foot!

Perry: Pardon me folks. That was just a very attractive mental patient.

Old Man: [uncomfortable silence at kitchen table] Someone, tell a joke...

As you can plainly see, from my selection of film quotes and the diverse characters from whence they come, I am, in fact, completely able to perform all of the functions necessary to being the perfect salesperson. I will use these quotes whenever necessary to invoke the power of la bella luna, thus creating a spiritual connection between myself and whomever I am selling to. Thusly under my thrall, I shall sell them more chocolate than they have ever had need for. Quickly I will be King of Chocolate Land, doer of great deeds and devout follower of the Moonstruck movie/chocolate store cult. I shall send off with this last quote that I think you will find quite humorous, in addition to being completely true:

Ronny Cammareri: I have a feeling this is going to be just delicious.

Thank you,

Nate Balding

1 comment:

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