Monday, December 14, 2009

Hi-rise Apartment Maintenance Tech

Experienced Apartment Maintenance Tech

MAXX Properties
300 East Seventeenth Apartments
300 E 17th Ave
Denver, 80203

Must have at least 3 years of apartment maintenance experience, high rise preferred. Experience in boilers, heat pumps, basic elevator knowledge and fan motor maintenance are required. Work orders, make readys and great customer service experience.

Competitive pay plus medical and dental benefits, paid time-off, 401(k) and other benefits offered.


Lemme guess, you're operating with one of those EV2600 models of elevator and the drive shaft on the portal entrance side is tacking up and making a grinding noise every time it lifts a story? Yeah, thought so.

The name's Balding, and apartment maintenance is my business. And not just apartments, no sir! Pretty much anything that swings, sinks, drinks or stinks, I'm the man for the job. Yeah, I've seen my fair share of the ups and downs in the maintenance biz - once saw a boiler set well past the thermometer's endemic safety module go all hot water balloon and burst up, taking a buddy of mine with it. God damn it, El Puerco, you'll be missed. Many are the times that these old eyes feel the salty caress of a teary sheen. I still remember to light the candle in the old church for his mother every April 3rd and to roast the carnitas until they're that perfect combination of sweet and tender before feeding them to Puerco's orphaned Golden Retriever, Ken.

But enough of that - you and I both know that getting into this business is a hell not worth going through if you don't have to, and that those who have The Touch can't help themselves a god damned bit once they've absorbed the ebullient perfume of rigging a simple PX38 model heating pump to a wide-nozzle S-ST200 with a bit of wire and some duct tape, rotating the bosom gear a tenth of a degree and spinning the plate back from hot to cold and turning that ventilation system into a well oiled machines ready to heat the whole damn building off a few dollars a day. Nope, once you've hit that spot, you're down for the count my friend. But you'd know that, you're the man with the ad.

So what say you and me start a beautiful relationship? There's a lot more in this world to see and do, and a lot more apartment buildings to spit polish into a shit pile that just fucking works, even though a lot o' the time it don't look like much. Let's his the sunset at an open stride, tearing into those walls and gutting those pipes like they were a spread of Trout freshly pulled from an Alaskan stream.

I don't think you'll find a better man for the job - not even zombie El Puerco.


Nate Balding

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